How to Improve your relationship and keep New Year’s resolutions
According to Statista’s
data, 15 percent of respondents said that they made a New Year’s Resolution to “find love” in 2018. Other common New Year’s Resolutions include saving money, eating healthier, and losing weight. One goal that is notable missing from the list? There should also be an emphasis on enhancing the health
of the primary love relationship once it is discovered. There also needs to be an emphasis on enhancing the health of the primary love relationship once it’s discovered.
Unfortunately, New Year’s Resolutions are almost synonymous with poor follow through–about 80% of resolutions fail by the time mid-February comes along.
For couples, setting goals to improve their relationship may not be the first thing that comes to mind at the turn of the calendar year. It may not be the first thing that couples think of when they start a new year, but setting goals to improve their relationship can have a significant impact. Both couples in healthy relationships and those in unhealthy ones can benefit from this. The challenge is to understand the reasons why New Year’s resolutions that are related to relationships (or goals in general) often fail. Consider these common causes. Goals are not aligned with personal values. The goal will not enhance a relationship if it does not enhance the sense of authenticity and self-worth in each individual. If your goals are large and intimidating, it’s easy to lose motivation. It’s easier for you to stick with your goals if you break them down into smaller, more manageable chunks. If you say “We want better communication,” it is fine. But, if that goal is not defined, how can the couple know if and when they have achieved the goal? The goal should be specific, and it must be created so that it can be measured or identified intuitively. Goals should only be focused on the short term. Couples and individuals should evaluate their visions for the next six months, a year, five years, and ten plus years on a regular basis. This will help bridge the gap between long-term and short-term success. The following suggestions will help you kickstart your goal setting session for the New Year. These goals are based on specific, measurable actions that can enhance communication, relationship satisfaction, and trust. Stay away from screens during meals. Why is it so important? Research shows that “phubbing,” which is “the act of snubbing someone in a social setting by looking at your phone instead of paying attention,” leads to lower levels of relationship satisfaction. Be present.
Schedule a weekly date
It’s easy to let a busy schedule take over your life. Couples that make quality time together create opportunities for bonding. Plan major holidays, such as Valentine’s Day or Mother’s/Father’s Day. Plan for major holidays (Valentine’s Day, Mother’s/Father’s Day, etc.) as well as novel and new activities (trips at a museum, sports events, day hikes or sporting events). ).
Plan a vacation
- Research shows that
- planning a vacation
- brings as much joy (if not more) than the actual vacation itself. Preparing for a vacation requires creativity, cooperation, and saving.
- Volunteer together
Working together to serve others is a
powerful bonding exercise
–and sets a good example for children, as well. Read books togetherThese can be books specific to relationship-building “
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
“
by John Gottman is a fantastic choice) or any other genre that both people will enjoy. For a relationship that thrives, both partners must be committed to strengthening their shared bond. Setting relationship-based goals is a great way to achieve this. Examples include weekly scheduled
check-ins, scheduling events directly on calendars, or even fun little incentives, such as a meal out or gifts to each other. This will not only foster a loving, meaningful relationship but will also improve the health of both parties involved. Can you measure such a thing? Take this free couples quiz to find out how well you know your partner and whether you are developing a negative perspective. Take this free couples quiz and find out how well you know your partner and whether you are developing a negative perspective.For an in-depth analysis of your relationship health check out the Gottman Relationship Adviser, a virtual relationship evaluation and improvement tool for couples.
